Love is Love: Raising Children

Recently, I was discussing with a group of coworkers about the fact that I am currently not interested in pushing out a baby.  Before I continue I am not against having children, but as of right now children are not in the cards for me. So to continue on with the story.  Everyone in the group chuckled and told me that I will most likely going have a kid, and we started discussing how raising children in modern society is a huge task, and some of the harsh realities of society today.  During this conversation, my supervisor stated “KP, you must not want children because you would dread the day when your son tells you he is gay, I mean look at all these homosexual and transgender children nowadays.”

At first, I was a little upset at the fact that my supervisor thought I was closed minded. I was also shocked that he assumed that when I talked about how modern society has destroyed the traditional childhood experience he thought I was referring to subjects such as the above.  This statement plagued me that entire night because deep down inside when I really thought about it he was absolutely right.

I consider myself open minded, but I would be completely mortified if my son came home and sat me down to tell me he is attracted to men.  I would feel that I failed as a parent.  I failed to show my son the right way to live life.  The plain and simple truth is my son should not have to sit me down and have a conversation about the person he loves or is attracted to.  He should not have to declare to me or anyone else who he is as a person.  He should not have to “come out of the closet”.  As a parent I would want my son to causally introduce me to his boyfriend without forewarning me of his gender.  I would want to raise my son to know that love is love no matter what.  I want to have that relationship with my children, where my son comes home gushing to me about his latest crush regardless of race, gender, ethnicity, economic status, or any other factor that separates all of us individuals within the human race.  Simply I would want my son or daughter to live a life that resembles their true personality, and to have children that never need to worry about the negative connotations in society regarding love and sexuality.

Moral of the story, my supervisor was right in all the wrong ways.  I am not afraid for my kids to be different from the norm, I am afraid to be a mother that raise children who think that being different or loving the same gender or a different race is not acceptable. I want them to grow up in a household that shows them that love is love no matter what, and I will be more than thrilled to meet person they decide to share their heart with. To my future children (although honestly I am okay with not having any devils) never fear that I will be closed minded and love whomever your heart desires.


An Open letter to my “Accidental” Little

After reading so many open letters between Bigs and Littles that do not exactly match our relationship, I decided that you needed an open letter that helps define how significant you are in my life. Here is a letter  for you to remember things that you may forget along the way.  So without further or due:

To my dearest little,

We do not have the traditional beginning or there is not a cute story about how we knew that we were a perfect match, but I could not imagine calling  anyone else as my “accidental” little.  I will never be able to say that I had a Pinterest Board dedicated to you before even meeting you for the first time (Although I had one for you afterwards), I cannot say that I spent a week trying to convince you that I was not your Big., or I did not spend a week crafting my heart out for you.

Although we do not have these traditional Big/Little beginning, our relationship blossomed into the perfect Big/Little “love story”. We have confided in each other, supported one another, argue about the stupidest things, spend hours talking about nothing, dancing in a frat house until the next morning, dishing out secrets, laughing uncontrollably, and going on adventures.  No matter where life takes us I want you to remember that as your Big:

I promise that I am always a phone call or a text away.  Regardless if it is a life crisis or to ask advice on an outfit for an interview, you will always get an answer.  I promise to always be your biggest supporter.  I will encourage all those little mistakes that create lasting memories and cheer for you as you begin to take your first steps into adulthood.

I promise to give you wise words when in times of trouble, have a shoulder for you to cry on, and have an open ear for your rant sessions.  I promise to tell you when you are being ridiculous and agree with you when you dislike someone. I promise to allow you to make your own mistakes and be there the next day to talk about those mistakes.  I promise to push you pass your comfort zone, but also protect you when needed.

I promise that you will always have a second home where ever I am in the world, and a friend in me.  Simply I promise to be your Big and to love you eternally.

Love your Big ❤